My Tribe

They say it is important to surround yourself with people who are good for your soul. People who vibrate on the same frequency as you do. People who are good for your growth as an individual.

I am fortunate to have been blessed in abundance with the types of people who have come into my life. The people who are strong, resilient, conscious, steadfast, deep, inherently good. People who have substance. People who are awake and enlightened.

I have a few souls in my life, who possess these qualities. Friends who have become family. Do not get me wrong, I am not saying my biological family do not possess these qualities. They do. However, I will dedicate another post to them. This post is to let those shining lights in my life, know, just how much of an impact they have had on me. Just how much they contribute to my happiness. My growth. My hustle.

In no particular order, I am going to run through a few of these souls and give only a brief summary of the role they play in my life. Because no amount of words would suffice to adequately, describe the actual greatness of these people.

When we nourish ourselves with good people, projects, surroundings, scenery, love, magic, beauty and self-care, we radiate light into the world and continually sharpen our vision, perception, and clarity all at once. This in turn spreads to other beings, which spreads to even more. Remember that one tiny drop can raise an ocean. Keep wanting. Desiring. Doing. Breathing in the sweet things.

Remember. Your vibe attracts your tribe.

Sanam.

This beauty has been in my life for about two years now. What a kind soul. Someone I can laugh with. Someone I can cry with. Someone I can tell my absolute deepest darkest secrets to, knowing there will be no judgement, only support and love. How kind can, one person be? I have no idea; however, I do know I have never seen a limit to her kindness. A soft soul. Highly intelligent. Strong. Enlightened. In the short space that we have known each other, she has been able to witness the most growth and progress that I have ever made in my entire life! She contributed for most of it.  She contributed to the change I have made, and she is always the logical person I turn to for advice. She is so balanced. She is just so smart. She inspires me daily, to be a better person. She knows what she wants in life, and that has motivated me to reassess my goals and want to do better. She is a go-getter, an independent girl. She is beautiful and sweet but she is determined and a pillar of strength and wisdom. One cannot cross paths with a soul of this nature and not feel inspired or motivated to be better and do better. Having support and love like that, can truly move mountains. I am so blessed that our journeys crossed paths, because now I have another strong woman in my corner. The world knows nothing of your beauty and splendour. That which you allow those closest to you witness. Not everyone deserves your benevolence and beauty. We are undeserving of such. Words will never be enough to express how much you mean to me.  A few words that comes to mind when I think of when I think of you are: gentle, mild-mannered, stable, sympathetic, amicable, and you brim with a strong sense of kind-heartedness and justice. Delicate thoughts, strong creativity and perseverance. Strong inner resilience. You have a pure heart. You flood my soul with happiness and joy.  Thank you for choosing to be in my life. Thank you for all that you do. Thank you. I love you.

“An invisible thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time, place, and circumstance. The thread may stretch or tangle. But it will never break” – Chinese proverb.

Eurishka.

Euri. My sissie boo. I met Euri when I was 11. We were neighbours. Soon became inseparable. We did everything together. Giggled about boys we had crushes on. Watched Rikki lake every day after school together. Played games, ran around the garden, hung out and spoke for hours on end. Euri has always been a guiding light in my life. A source of endless love and support. If I want to tell a story, about something insignificant and mundane, Euri will sit and listen. No matter how insignificant and mundane. She has all the time in the world for me. She always brings such joy and love wherever she goes. Euri has a peace-making nature about her. People cannot be angry around her, because her positive energy is enough to light up any room. Euri, her dad and I shared a special bond. Her dad would pick us up after school, and every day he fetched us and listened patiently about the kind of day we had. What a wonderful man. Rest in peace Uncle Vis. Thank you for the part you have played in Euri and my lives. Euri, you are truly your father’s daughter. You remind me so much of him. With your soft nature, your patience, your peace-making. Your laughter. Your funny but dry jokes. Thank you for choosing to be in my life… and thank you for staying in my life for all these years. You are more than just a friend to me. More than just a neighbour for me. More than all of that. You are a part of my soul. You always have been, and you always will be. I will always be your biggest fan. I love you.

Tanita.

Oh Tanita. My diamond in the sky. My bestie boo. You happened upon my life so randomly, but I am grateful for that random moment, because it brought me one of the best friends I have ever had. You may tell me that red lipstick does not suit me, and I may forget that your favourite colour is pink, but something I will NEVER forget, is how much you mean to me. We can hang out every day for weeks, and then not see each other for months, yet things will always stay the same between us. We have a special bond, and guess what? I will eat sand for you too. Hehe. You seize every opportunity you have to spoil me, and make me feel special. You take every opportunity to show me how much you care. You check in with me EVERY SINGLE DAY without fail, just to know how I am, and how my day was. In the beginning, it was so hard to get you to say you love me, yet now you take every opportunity to do so. We spent the best years of our partying life, together. Making memories. We look back on all those times and laugh at how good they were. I wish to never stop making memories with you. I wish you everything of the best in this life and every other lifetime. I am blessed to be your friend and lucky enough to be your BESTFRIEND. #NONEWFRIENDS lol. Remember that? No need to tell me that, no one will ever replace the space you have in my life. Thank you for caring about my well-being and supporting every decision I have ever made, even though you do not always agree with it. No matter what, I know I can ALWAYS count on you. You know that you can always count on me too. I love you.

Herusha.

Heru Heru, Heru. Heru affectionately addresses me as her pinky poodle. Heru has been a constant in my life for about the same amount of years as Euri. Heru also lived in my neighbourhood, so it was easy to just run up the road and hang out with her. Heru spoils me. Every time I see her, she’s either got the best hugs and cuddles for me. Or the coolest new make up to give me. Or the most delicious food she makes for me. Or straight forward- honest advice for me. Heru is the one person I can count on, to tell me the harsh truths in life. She does so with tact and sensitivity, and always with love and care, but always honest. Heru has never stopped loving me or caring for me. Even when she moved to JHB and I was still in DBN, she would still phone me, for hours at a time, listening to all the things going on in  my life. Heru is a blessing from God himself. He handpicked her, to play a vital role in my life. I am immensely grateful for her. My Heru is so selfless and giving, sometimes almost to a fault. She gives her utmost love and respect to those she holds near and dear. Heru, you have saved me on many occasions. From those times of sitting home and watching VH1 while everyone else around us partied, to drawing lame pictures in my economics textbooks, to organizing my many birthday parties. You have always gone out of your way for me. I want you to know how much I appreciate your presence in my life. And how much of a difference your presence in my life actually makes. You are a person of substance and I’m so glad you are my constant. I love you.

Kolean.

The newest member of my tribe. What better way to start a new year, new job, new city with my Ko-Pilot? This year has had ups and downs for the both of us, but you have been by my side through it all. Kolean and I share some core values which makes our friendship so effortless. We both have an undying and ever fierce love for God. We both value Education and Academics as highly important in our lives. Kolean is one of those sincere genuine people who will actually listen to every word you say. Even if it is the same things over and over, she just gives you all her attention. It is the most simple things, like she genuinely respects my suggestions. If I send her the name of a song, or the link to a video, she goes ahead and listens, or watches and tells me how much she has enjoyed it and that means a lot to me. Kolean, I learn from you everyday. You are never afraid to share your knowledge. I love the fact that you are unashamed to love God so much. I would not have made it through this year without you. Every second I spend with you, makes me realize how grateful I am for your presence in my life. Thank you for being my road trip partner, and for bringing me food whenever you cook something amazing. Thank you for your love and support this year. I know our friendship will continue to grow and flourish for many years to come.  I love you.

To all these strong, beautiful ladies in my life. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. You mean the world to me.

To those of you reading, I hope you make the decision to surround yourself with people who are good for your soul.

During my time at college, I heard someone say “I would rather eat crumbs with bums, than steaks with snakes” and it loosely translates to: I would rather be struggling but be with people who wish well for me, rather than eating expensive food with people who resemble snakes in our lives.

That saying resonated with me. It lingered and it stayed, and as I grew older, it would appear to make more and more sense to me.

Go where you are celebrated, go where you are appreciated, go where you are loved. Do not settle for any less than that.

Make conscious decisions and choices about the type of energy you want to allow in your life and in your space.

It is said that if you want to know about someone, look at the type of friends they keep. I am proud to say my wonderful friends are all reflections of me and I of them. They are beautiful, successful, accomplished, intelligent, kind, loving, genuine and sincere.

My dearest readers, I wish you the best with your friendships and all your relationships. Choose wisely. As always, I wish peace, love and light.

Below are pictures of the angels I wrote about. Enjoy!

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Seasons : The journey of self love ❤️ •Orchard in a storm🌪⛈•The birds and the trees🕊🌲•Roots of happiness 🌲🌳🌴

“Some people survive and talk about it. Some people survive and go silent. Some people survive and create. Everyone deals with unimaginable pain in their own way, and everyone is entitled to that, without judgement. So the next time you look at someone’s life covetously, remember… you may not want to endure what they are enduring right now, at this moment, whilst they sit so quietly before you, looking like a calm ocean on a sunny day. Remember how vast the ocean’s boundaries are. Whilst somewhere the water is calm, in another place in the very same ocean, there is a colossal storm.” —Nikita Gill, People Survive in Different Ways

So I watched a video which inspired me and heavily influenced my writing today. In fact, most of the video made me reflect and influenced this piece. I’d like to share a few thoughts with you. Bear in mind, this post is raw and real. It’s not perfect and certainly not a perfect piece of writing. But it’s true and it’s honest. 

Here it is:
Some people come into your life for a lifetime, some for a season. You have to know which is which. You will always mess up if you mix the seasonal people with lifetime expectations.



I put everybody who comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on the tree. The wind blows – they’re over here (unstable), it blows the other way, they’re over there. Seasons changes and they wither and die. They’re gone. It’s alright. That’s some people. Most people in the world are like them, they’re just there to take from the tree- they do nothing but take and give shade every now and then. That’s all they can do. But don’t get mad at people like that. That’s who they are.



 Some people are like a branch on that tree. You gotta be careful with the branches too. They might fool you. They make you think they are strong and a good friend but the minute you step out on your own, they will break and leave you high and dry.



But if you find yourself 2 or 3 people in your life that are like the roots at the bottom of the tree. You are blessed because that’s the kind of people that aren’t going anywhere. If those roots weren’t there, that tree couldn’t live. A tree can have a hundred million branches but only a few roots down at the bottom, to make sure it gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them. 

But the rest, let it go. Let people go.
Nobody said it would be easy, but it gets easy when you learn how to love yourself. When you get to a point in your life when you look at people and go “you or me?”, you have to make a decision.

I’m not saying just throw people away. But if they’re doing something you don’t like, raise the issue with them. If you see them even trying to make an effort, that’s a person worth keeping. That’s a leaf that’s trying to grow up and be something else. You understand? 

But if you tell somebody “what you’re doing is hurting me and I need you to stop” and they keep doing it. They don’t care. Move on. Let them go. No matter how much it hurts, let them go. It gets easier, I promise you, every day it gets easier but you just got to make it through.



Sometimes you gotta learn how to be by yourself. People have to learn how to be alone. I don’t understand all these people saying “oh I need somebody”, that is crazy as hell. If you don’t know how to be by yourself, what are you gonna do with somebody else?

Work on you. Figure yourself out. Get yourself together.

 I’d rather be in a corner by myself with a puppy and a goldfish and be happy than be sitting around with somebody in my life and I’m wondering “what the hell are they there for??”



You would be surprised at the things people will put up with, just to hear somebody say they love them. That’s crazy. I don’t understand anymore.

I can’t live in dysfunction. I’m sorry.



I’m sorry.



I’ve come through too much. Been through too much hell and high-water to come here and let a person come up into my adult life when I’m supposed to be at peace and give me all kinds of hell.


So there it is. My thoughts from today. My soul exposed. I hope it will help atleast one person or touch someone today. 

I hope you find your roots and I hope you find your strength. 

Wishing you peace and light. 

“Being a good person is a choice. Don’t let people fool you into believing that truly good people never have bad thoughts, are never tempted by the easier path, by the low road, never mess up or act out selfishly. Never believe a person can be good without making a conscious effort.

Every single time you do something good, you’ve made a decision to make the world a little brighter.

Goodness is not an inherent trait, it is a choice. Keep making it. I see you, I’m proud of you, and I’m rooting for you.” -Molly Anne #ThingsToNeverForget

artwork by Yoshimi Uchida

3 Great Loves

I found this article on Elephant Journal. It’s by an Author named Kate Rose. 

I read it and it made sense to me. I thought I would share it here with you. 

These aren’t my words, they’re the words of author Kate Rose who wrote the article for elephant Journal website. 

However, they are thoughts and sentiments I agree with. They just kinda explain so much by simplifying things. I liked it. It may not be everyone’s cuppa tea, but if you wanna read about a writers interpretation of the three greatest loves of our lives, then read this. Some are lucky enough to have one great love. Others not. Read anyway. I think it’s lovely to hear others interpretations on love because every single person has a different opinion and view. So here is the article:

“It’s been said that we really only fall in love with three people in our lifetime.


Yet, it’s also believed that we need each of these loves for a different reason.


Often our first is when we are young, in high school even. It’s the idealistic love—the one that seems like the fairytales we read as children.


This is the love that appeals to what we should be doing for society’s sake—and probably our families. We enter into it with the belief that this will be our only love and it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t feel quite right, or if we find ourselves having to swallow down our personal truths to make it work because deep down we believe that this is what love is supposed to be.


Because in this type of love, how others view us is more important than how we actually feel.


 


It’s a love that looks right.


The second is supposed to be our hard love—the one that teaches us lessons about who we are and how we often want or need to be loved. This is the kind of love that hurts, whether through lies, pain or manipulation.


We think we are making different choices than our first, but in reality we are still making choices out of the need to learn lessons—but we hang on. Our second love can become a cycle, oftentimes one we keep repeating because we think that somehow the ending will be different than before. Yet, each time we try, it somehow ends worse than before.


Sometimes it’s unhealthy, unbalanced or narcissistic even. There may be emotional, mental or even physical abuse or manipulation—most likely there will be high levels of drama. This is exactly what keeps us addicted to this storyline, because it’s the emotional rollercoaster of extreme highs and lows and like a junkie trying to get a fix, we stick through the lows with the expectation of the high.


With this kind of love, trying to make it work becomes more important than whether it actually should.


It’s the love that we wished was right.


And the third is the love we never see coming. The one that usually looks all wrong for us and that destroys any lingering ideals we clung to about what love is supposed to be. This is the love that comes so easy it doesn’t seem possible. It’s the kind where the connection can’t be explained and knocks us off our feet because we never planned for it.


This is the love where we come together with someone and it just fits—there aren’t any ideal expectations about how each person should be acting, nor is there pressure to become someone other than we are.


We are just simply accepted for who we are already—and it shakes to our core.


It isn’t what we envisioned our love would look like, nor does it abide by the rules that we had hoped to play it safe by. But still it shatters our preconceived notions and shows us that love doesn’t have to be how we thought in order to be true.


This is the love that keeps knocking on our door regardless of how long it takes us to answer.


It’s the love that just feels right.


Maybe we don’t all experience these loves in this lifetime, but perhaps that’s just because we aren’t ready to. Maybe the reality is we need to truly learn what love isn’t before we can grasp what it is.


Possibly we need a whole lifetime to learn each lesson, or maybe, if we’re lucky, it only takes a few years.


Perhaps it’s not about if we are ever ready for love, but if love is ready for us.


And then there may be those people who fall in love once and find it passionately lasts until their last breath. Those faded and worn pictures of our grandparents who seemed just as in love as they walked hand-in-hand at age 80 as they did in their wedding picture—the kind that leaves us wondering if we really know how to love at all.


Someone once told me they are the lucky ones, and perhaps they are.


But I kinda think that those who make it to their third love are really the lucky ones.


They are the ones who are tired of having to try and whose broken hearts lay beating in front of them wondering if there is just something inherently wrong with how they love.


But there’s not; it’s just a matter of if their partner loves in the same way they do or not.


Just because it has never worked out before doesn’t mean that it won’t work out now.


What it really comes down to is if we are limited by how we love, or instead love without limits. We can all choose to stay with our first love, the one that looks good and will make everyone else happy. We can choose to stay with our second under the belief that if we don’t have to fight for it, then it’s not worth having—or we can make the choice to believe in the third love.


The one that feels like home without any rationale; the love that isn’t like a storm—but rather the quiet peace of the night after.


And maybe there’s something special about our first love, and something heartbreakingly unique about our second…but there’s also just something pretty amazing about our third.


The one we never see coming.

The one that actually lasts.

The one that shows us why it never worked out before.


And it’s that possibility that makes trying again always worthwhile, because the truth is you never know when you’ll stumble into love.”


“You found parts of me I didn’t know existed and in you I found a love I no longer believed was real.” ~ Unknown



Sometimes when you’re walking to or from your destination and it’s just you and nature, and the quietness and stillness of being alone, you think really deeply about things. The littlest things. Or the big things. Anything really. I feel like getting lost in thought is healthy sometimes. And because I’m a dreamer, it happens more often than not with me. I think about love a lot. And this article struck a deep nerve, and deserved some equally deep introspection.

I really liked this article. A lot. 
Peace and light to you. I hope you all find that great love of your life! And I hope it’s magical.